There is a story of a mother who occasionally gave her eight-year old daughter money to buy a kilogram of sweets. There were two confectionery shops in front of the house. But the daughter always went to one shop, completely ignoring the other. The mother asked her daughter why.
Insightful wisdom
The daughter’s response was insightful, and helpful for all of us as aspiring leaders. “Whenever I tried the other shop and asked for a kilogram of sweets, the shopkeeper put some sweets on the weighing scale and then took away some sweets. But when I go to my shop and ask for a kilogram of sweets, he puts some sweets on the weighing scale and then adds more”.
Leadership wisdom from the lips of a child.
In both cases, the shopkeepers were giving her a kilogram of sweets but the way they got there — giving or taking — helped her decide which one to go to. Leaders in business often have to make decisions on pricing, product or service packs, on employee pay negotiations, and on commercial bids, to name a few. This story provides a valuable lesson on how to turn these into winning conversations. How do we go about making this a habit?
Giving vs taking
We’ve had recent disruptions at taxi companies like Uber and Ola. Initially, cab drivers were paid fantastic incentives. But now, as the companies cope with rising losses and push towards profitability, driver incentives are being reduced. And the drivers are livid — “You gave and now you are taking away”. A little bit of listening, a little bit of respect and a little bit of transparency would have gone a long way in deciding how to ‘take’ and how to ‘give’.
Listen and respect
Nestle CMD, Suresh Narayanan writes of a time when he was in his mid-twenties and incharge of one of the then HLL’s factories at Ahmedabad. He received news that the 35-man factory was to be shut and production moved out. He had to speak to the workers, who were led by ‘a very difficult man’, the union leader. The union leader asked him in Tamil, “Chinna paiyya, enna seidee?” (Hey, little boy, what’s the matter?).
As Narayanan puts it, “Clearing my throat, I explained the situation in Tamil and said I had to do my job but wanted to do whatever I could for the workers. For some reason, he accepted that and we started speaking to the workers. It was one of the most humbling lessons of my career and taught me the power of how people can be, how people should be treated. If you deal with people with respect, transparency and sincerity, even the crustiest person responds. These were unionised workers who could have made things really difficult. But, they didn’t. At the end, all they asked for was a watch, saying they had spent 15 to 20 years in the company and wanted this token.”
When Narayanan approached headquarters, the initial response was no. He even offered to buy the watches himself, even though he wasn’t earning enough. Eventually every worker received a watch and a stormy situation was averted. He had learnt an important lesson of listening and respecting so that the giving and the taking was amicable.
Personal experience
On giving and taking, I have a personal example. I subscribe to one of the well-known set-top box brands, and can access several channels using their service. But each time I renew my annual membership, I find the price increased, and channels that were previously free are now charged. Most often, I find Monday’s movie playing again on Tuesday and Friday and again the week after!
But after I subscribed to Netflix, I find a fixed price, which is a tad expensive, but the movies keep pouring in. Every other day, when I sign in, there’s a new blockbuster on offer and a high-quality search and viewing experience. You can immediately see the parallel with the sweetshop story — one where there’s only taking and one where there’s giving. Instead of having a delighted customer, my set-top box company risks losing me as a customer, and Netflix has me not just satisfied but a raving fan.
Once we graduate, as first-time employees, we will have to make a choice — do we look for what we can take from the companies we join or do we look for what we can give? Can we ensure that our employer will have the positive experience, similar to that of the child who shopped after she saw that she was getting more for what she’s paid?
See things from the other side
At workshops I run for leaders, I often ask participants to think of this Roman numeral equation, formed with matchsticks on the table in front of me and facing them.
XI + I = X
I ask them if it’s right or wrong. The whole group responds “wrong”. I then ask them how we can correct the equation without moving or touching any of the matches.
Usually, the group gives up after suggesting a few incorrect options. But some times, a wise soul chimes out, “Go to the other side”. The moment somebody from the group comes to my side, they see the equation differently.
X= I + IX
This is, of course, correct.
If the participants hadn’t seen the ‘other side’, we could argue all day — I, saying the equation was right, and them saying the equation was wrong. There would be no hope of agreement — until somebody goes to the ‘other side’. Then argument is replaced with agreement.
‘Other’ PoV
Often, as leaders, we take a stand on something that looks right from our point of view. But we rarely pause to think, “How does the other side think and feel about this?” Perception is reality. If they perceive it differently from the way I see it, then that is their reality.
A product, a service, a contract clause, a pricing decision, a salary negotiation — whatever the situation, there is always another point of view, and unless I am open to seeing the other side, I risk taking a decision that is short-sighted and ineffective. I can start practising this habit today with faculty, with classmates, with the interviewer at placement discussions — seeing things from the other side.
Bundle in unexpected value
Kindle wasn’t the first e-book reader to be launched, nor the best. Sony had released the Reader before Kindle hit the market. But while Sony claimed 20,000 titles available at launch, Amazon launched their Kindle with 80,000 e-books on launch day. Prices of the e-books were also offered at a substantial discount compared with the paperback versions. Amazon beat Sony by simply bundling unexpected value.
Look for things that the other side values, then better it and bundle it in. Google, as an employer, has done this by giving employees fun workspaces, free meals at work and 20 per cent time during which employees can choose to work on projects of their choice. This isn’t just value to an employee, this is unexpected value bundled in.
Often, we are scared, thinking it is not viable. We are trapped in a win-lose mentality. But all it takes is the will to search for unexpected value and the creativity to find a viable way to bundle it in. Ask yourself: “As a student on campus, am I prepared to go the extra mile on a project paper, or to take on assignments beyond the scope of my studies?”
This will dictate whether you become a ‘take’ employee tomorrow, whose conversations with the boss are around pay increases and perks and promotions, or a ‘give’ employee who bundles unexpected value in by asking for challenging assignments, collaborating with cross-functional teams, and by volunteering on community projects.
This approach can’t be faked. It has to be backed with a genuine desire to give, and not just take. It can’t be a technique masquerading as doing the right thing. If it is sincere and transparent, the leader will have earned the trust, and that earns her more in the long term than a brutal ‘taking-away’ pan-scale approach.