It was an illuminating and engaging experience for the students of Loyola Institute of Business Administration (LIBA), Chennai, when Prof George Kohlrieser, an American born clinical and organisational psychologist, veteran hostage negotiator, author, speaker, consultant and professor of Leadership and Organisational Behaviour at the International Institute for Management Development (IMD), Lausanne, Switzerland addressed the students on ‘High performance Leadership’. This was part of the Beyond Management Initiative session, held on August 30.
Leadership starts with leading one’s self. A true leader must have control over his or her emotions and thoughts, he said. Highlighting the importance of youth leadership, Prof Kohlrieser stressed on dialogue and bonding. Having been a part of over 100 hostage negotiations himself, the professor highlighted: “Leadership’s key challenge lies in bonding with the people you don’t like”. And, he went on to explain, this challenge can only be met by getting rid of a tribal mindset, that categorises people as ‘them’ and ‘us’.
He also said that the human brain is fundamentally negative, adding, “It is at peace only when it is sure that there is no fear or pain. Keeping it vibrant and positive is a tough task. One way of doing so is by finding a secure base. A secure base can be a person, place, goal or object that provides a sense of comfort.”
“Leaders need to let go of their ego. Leading is about serving, it is a human process,” he emphasised. Today’s business leaders need to become secure bases for their employees. There is a need to lead from the mind’s eye, interweaving dialogue and bonding in the leadership fabric.
In his special message for India, Prof Kohlrieser said, “Indian leaders need to be inspirational drivers of change. While there is a need for women in India to fight for their rights and stand their ground, men need to learn to bond and show emotions.”
His talk was followed by a Q & A session, where the professor answered the queries put forth by the audience.
You talked about bonding with the people you don’t like. I find that very difficult. How do I do it?
Very often, you have to deal with people you may not like. Given the necessity of the situation, communication is a must. The key is to look at things from other people’s perspectives and learn to accept and agree. Once you do this, the next step is to form bonds by means of dialogue and it does not end there. You need to nurture those bonds.
How do I find my secure base?
You can find your secure base in your parents, friends, teachers, your goals or even in an object. You need to identify what comforts you. It should be something that makes you let go of your fears and gives your brain a sense of security.
How do I make sure that I don’t become too dependent on my secure base?
You have to understand where the boundary is. Deriving a sense of security from your secure base is one thing, becoming too dependent on it is another. You have to be careful. Your secure base should help you excel, not make you complacent.
You talked about accepting and agreeing. Is it not difficult to always accept and agree to another person?
It definitely is not possible to always accept and agree with the person next to you, but looking at things from the other person’s perspective gives you a better understanding of the situation. A better and clearer understanding leads to better decision-making. A high performance leadership has its roots in having a holistic view.
Leaders also have emotions. They also experience sadness and grief which affects their leadership. How should this be tackled?
We all are humans. We go through a myriad emotions. This does affect our productivity, and it is difficult to have a set of measures or an algorithm to get over grief. However, being rational, accepting the reality and moving on, forgiveness, and gratitude can help.